There goes a spanker!

Posted in children,Life by Ashley Franklin on October 4, 2011
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To be completely racist and unintentionally racist at the same time, I’ve always found white people amazing for the most part-particularly white parents. Here’s why: I’ve never known any white people who got spanked as a child. I’ve been around white people my entire life-moreso than black people. While I’m sure that are some white parents who spank, just as I’m sure there are some black parents who don’t spank, I have not come into contact with any of them. How do they do it?

If you don’t know, I LOVE Katt Williams. One of my faves is when he says maybe black folk should stop beating their kids… publicly and does a bit about a mom beating her kid over the kid wanting some skittles.  (I’m telling you now, don’t click on that link if you’re sensitive to foul language. You’ve been warned.)

So my overarching question is this: how do you discipline your kids if you don’t spank them? Like, if you and your spouse both come from homes were spanking (or beating) was okay but decide it’s not for you, how on earth do you discipline your kids without going back to what you’re accustomed to? Having worked at a daycare, I’ve seen many a child laugh at time out, come out worse from it, and even give thankful praise for the privilege of having time to sit alone (that’s another story). 

So dear reader, were you spanked as a child, and if so, did you decide to spank your kids as well? If you’re not a spanker, how do you go about disciplining your child?If you haven’t had children yet, what’s your take? I’m just a little curious. 


My grandma is my best friend

Posted in Aging,Life by Ashley Franklin on January 29, 2011
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What makes your best friend your best friend?

A couple weeks ago, I was on the phone with my grandma (mom-mom as I like to call her). The fact that we were on the phone wasn’t anything special. I talk to her everyday-at least twice. She works part-time. I work from home. I didn’t realize mom mom was my best friend until this particular conversation. It went something like this:

Me: Mom-mom, you’re the only person I talk to everyday. Well…that I don’t live with.

Mom-mom: Yeah, well why do you think that is?

Me: I don’t know. (long for no reason pause) Wait….Mom-mom, are you my best friend?

Mom-mom: You’ve got it! (insert grandma chuckle)

I’d never given it much thought. My grandma–my best friend? How does that happen? I started to wonder if this was normal. Then, as fate would have it, I saw a Humana commercial. If you haven’t seen it, it features a bunch of kids hanging out with their grandparents. And as you can imagine, at least a few make the same declaration about being best friends with their grandparent.

And why wouldn’t she be my best friend? We talk all the time, she gives me encouragement, she tells me when I suck, knows me better than practically anyone else on Earth (versus the other planets, right? lol) and is just plain awesome. Mom-mom has always been my favorite person on the planet. Maybe that’s why I’m so surprised to realize the extent of it. Maybe it has taken me just this long to come to the realization of what a best friend really is.

It used to be someone I shared a bff bracelet with. Then it changed to someone I could convince to go along with any foolish idea I had. Now, it’s someone I know cares for me beyond a shadow of a doubt, wants the best for me, won’t hesitate to tell me when I’m wrong, and pushes me to become a good person. Add a dash of a few decades of wisdom, and that has Mom-mom written all over it.